Now…this is a phrase so many of us are familiar with over the last year. ‘Work from home mum’ now I know I am not alone in the fact that I find this HARD! This week has been super tough for me after isolating for two weeks as we had covid, me and the hubby have now had to get straight back to work double fold since we are both self employed and we have two weeks worth of work to catch up on and customers that we have made promises to. What this means is my hubby is working double days, some days he leaves at 5am and he doesn’t get home till midnight. This unfortunately means my work has had to be put to the bottom of the priority list as my main priority is obviously to look after our daughter. Meaning once she goes to bed (on a good day at 7pm) I can then start work which is taking me up until midnight myself, then the 5/6am starts on repeat all week. Now I love my life, my job and my family but I think it’s fair to say I am exhausted!
EXHAUSTED!
This is my release, writing this is getting that frustration out, and I feel like maybe someone is reading this, is going through the same and knows they are not alone.
Today has been a frustrating day, we should have gone on holiday this morning but we had to push it to tomorrow due to work commitments that couldn’t be changed. So we have spent the day juggling all sorts as we needed to pack the caravan and we both have work to complete. Unfortunately my work is the bottom of the list yet again so I will now be taking it away with me.
Now why is it that as a work from home mum that my job has the be the bottom of the pile? I have built a business from the ground up, I put the hours in and I work bloody hard. Well that’s the thing, firstly I am self employed and have the benefit that I can set my own hours to a point. But the work has to get done regardless! Unfortunately my work doesn’t bring in as much money as my husbands. So yes I understand why his work has to be a priority. However, if I did work full time hours I would certainly be in a position where by I could match my husbands earnings with the right effort. Unfortunately work from home mums fall into a gender stereotype whereby we get judged for many reasons, we work too much and don’t pay our kids attention, we are lazy and don’t want to go and get a ‘proper job’ (yes someone has said this to me before), we are unreliable as we have to prioritise our family life over our jobs. I could go in for hours about this…but this isn’t a blog post about gender stereotypes, this is the ramblings of a tired mother who just wants to give my brain a break.
So Whoever you are what category you fall into, me specifically a work from home mum, Do you know what you are? Do you know what we really are are?….
WE ARE QUEENS! Absolute fucking QUEENS!
We have a very hectic work/life schedules, we plan our days to the absolute minute. We are there for breakfast, dinner, bath time and bed time, we are there to run around the park, and go cycling, we are there when your child falls and grazes their knee and cry’s none stop because they want a cuddle, we do our best to keep a house which 9 times out of 10 in my case looks like a bomb has gone off, we do the laundry and dishes and change the beds. Then on top of this we work, in my case I run a business, I am in constant contact with my customers, I am ordering supplies, I am traipsing to the post office to send my orders and I am keeping my accounts for the dreaded time of the year when I need to do my accounts.
As someone who built a successful career pre-children for being organised and being able to arrange dozens of schedules without fault. I had impeccable time management skills, It was nothing compared to the schedule that I run now.
Now yes I may be busy and my brain is constantly on overdrive, but sometimes you really need to force yourself to have some ME TIME! Last night although I had a lot of things to do I had to make the decision to look after myself first. I put my little one to bed and ran myself a bath and popped on some spa music, I followed this with a 20 minute mindfulness meditation and then I spent half an hour starting a new book.
I felt renewed! Originally I was going to have an early night and go to bed at 7 but I thought I’m sure there is a way where I can clear my mind, relax and renew my body. And it really did, I started to feel guilty for taking this time for myself but you know what, sod it, I enjoyed being selfish. If I had of carried on spinning all those plates I would have made a mistake or I would of burnt out. Now I feel fresh to crack on with that plate spinning.
So no matter what plates you are spinning, if your a stay at home mum, a work from home mum, full time working mum, single mum, mum of one or mum of five, single daddy, or you don’t have kids but are constantly juggling this mad world we live in…be selfish once and a while. You’ve got to be kind to yourself and your body.
As RuPaul says “If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else!”
Love your partner, love your kids, love your friends, but also love yourself!
Ps. I just want to note how amazingly supportive my hubby is, he does his fair share of plate spinning and we make a great team, but sometimes we all get a bit frustrated and need to have some self care time x
Comments